There are multiple versions of you. Well, there are at least two that I know of. There are two of me too. Confusing isn't it? What you may not know right now is that one version of me is speaking very directly to one version of you. When I see you and speak to you in person, I tend to believe that there is just one of you...but that's not true...there's two. And when one of you speak to me in person, you have always thought that there was only one Ron Lyons. But, again, there's two. Scary huh?
So you think I'm nuts? or are you slightly intrigued and want to see where I go with this? Either way, keep reading...there's something here for you, or should I say, for "both" of you. Whomever of the two of you is reading right now, keep reading. I promise you, before you read the last words of this agglomeration, I will help set you free; both of you.
Have you ever noticed that you have the ability to do really well at something? Take, for instance, eating right and working out on a regular basis. Somehow, through the myriad of fantastical details that we call "life" you find your way into a healthy eating regimen. Amazing. But not only are you eating healthy -you are also working out consistently! Now that's even more amazing. Everyday you are mindful of what you are eating, you follow the plan and you see results! Soon you begin to believe that maybe this is it. Maybe this is the time that it sticks. Many times in the past you have started off well, only to crumble and fall back into old habits, but maybe, just maybe, you got it now!
The sad reality is that before long you find yourself eating food that just maybe a week before you would have sworn you would never eat again. Sometimes, it's not just a little bite of this or that, sometimes it's alot of this or that. Sometimes it's so much that you may wonder if you have an eating disorder or some major defect. Let me just tell you right now, you don't. You are not broken, you are not defective and you do not have an eating disorder. Just stop reading right now if you take offense to me "diagnosing" you like this. I know Dr. Oz told you different last Tuesday and a year ago Oprah disagreed with my diagnosis that you are NORMAL too. On the other hand, if you are open to the idea that maybe you are just like the rest of us, then keep on reading.
So here's the deal. When you are "on plan" and doing everything right with food and exercise, that's but ONE version of you. When life starts kicking your ass and Bluebell becomes your midnight best friend, that's another version of you. Don't you even start to deny that both of you exist now. I know you do. In fact, I spend my life trying to bring more of one of you into the light and push the other one back. But be clear about one thing. I do not and will not ever try to get rid of the Bluebell loving version of you. I can't, and, neither can you.
If you have children, I want you to think of them right now. If you do not have kids, then imagine a relationship with someone that you love deeply. As sure as I sit here typing this, the child or the person that you are thinking of will (and likely has) let you down before. Chances are beyond excellent that they have even hurt you before with their words or actions. At the same time, whomever you are thinking of has been a Godsend to you too. Happiness, joy, love, smiles...these are the things that this person has given you.
Let me ask you, if this person had to be perfect all the time, could they be? What would happen if the first time this person hurt your feelings, made a mistake or did something wrong, you had to forget all about them. No chance huh? Wouldn't happen. Thank you. You are right. Truth is, we all have people in our lives that hurt us or do us wrong at times. I'll tell you this much, if you are looking at me, you won't have to look far at all to find many faults. That's me, imperfect. Or, I should say, that's ONE of me. The other one of me gets it right fairly often.
Do you know that the greatest gift you have to give is love? Sounds silly coming from me, I know. But I'm doing you no service if I'm not straight on honest with you. Think about it. Love is what motivates us, love is what we live for. Love is an amazing, God made emotion that fuels life. You love people, you love food, you love sunsets and beaches...you love so many things except for that ONE thing. Well, except for that one OTHER thing. That other version of you, baby.
Wow. Let that sink in just a bit. If you missed it, reread it until you get it. If you still don't get it, call me. It's that important. I believe that you LOVE the you that does right...eats healthy, works out like a crazy person and gets results. But, I believe that you likely hate the you that drowns in a container of ice-cream or Whataburger or Crown Royal...or whatever. It's all nearly the same, isn't it?
If you would disown your own child the person you love for doing wrong then I say you are one hundred percent correct in hating the other version of yourself! But, if you would never do that...never walk away from those you love so much, then learn something from me now. Love yourself the same way. Did you just get that? Love yourself, the bad, Twinkee eating, Dr. Pepper drinking, Cheeto crunching version of you. It's time to make your peace. You have spent entirely too long hating yourself.
Start by acknowledging that there are two versions of you. One that's squared away and gets it right almost all the time and one that simply doesn't. One that makes you smile and one that makes you cry. One you are proud of and one that you are ashamed of. Just admitting that both exists brings major healing where you have needed it for a long, long time.
Next, make peace with yourself. It goes like this. Me, mirror, quiet. Long pause, deep breath, then "Hello." That's the start. Next is "It's good to finally acknowledge you. You know that I have always hated you, despised you and wished you were not a part of me. But, you are and therefore I will no longer hate you. In fact, I accept you. You are as much a part of me as my own breath is. But, know this. As much as I accept you, you are not ALL that I am. I am more. I am capable and I am strong. I am not defeated, nor will I ever be. I have grasped success today simply because I accept you and will no longer hate you."
Do it. When you make peace with yourself, YOU will succeed in ways that you never thought possible. Please take the time to learn to love yourself, -successes, failures, good, bad and everything in-between. I have faith in you and believe in you. Now do that for yourself and don't hesitate to ask me for help if you need it. It's what I do....
Writers note: I want to dedicate this to someone who has made a profound impact on my life with her own. Recently, this person whom I have known "of" for years but never truly taken the time to get to know has had a tremendous tragedy in her life. This person has faced something that no one should ever have to face. Every day I see her stand with strength and determination that is amazing and can only come from one thing, the love she has for God and for the man and children He blessed her with. Her family is one less now, but her impact on those of us who know her is undeniable. Thank you for reminding the rest of us what it means to love. God bless you W.